I work in corporate and have a leadership role. I find that millennial women leaders, myself included aren't necessarily aiming for likability anymore. We're aiming for respect. There is a trade off here and that is the core of the issue. Women continue to be judged for being the fast talkers you've described, and the generational work in my view is to be the fast talker anyway. What men can do best to support this, is to give women the space to do that, instead of being surprised. I for one, don't think there is a clear 'Yin' style. Women and men both have masculine and feminine traits.
As someone who has stayed away from corporate life because the masculine vocabulary you described fills me with revulsion and perhaps fear, I feel like I have gained so much insight into that which I had shut out in order to create myself.
"I realize I am judgmental about soft, caring, and emotional words. When people around me use such words, I seem to shrink inside." These two lines are a prism through which the world I had ignored so far now looks rich and expansive. Thankyou for sharing, Ajay.
As a woman, it's wonderful to see a man grow aware of the default male setting that's enabled in corporate life, and to consciously develop different ways of being and doing. Enjoyed reading this!
Love the reflections. I could see myself in some of the accounts you share. The language you mention, Ajay, suggests a Win-Lose frame of the world. Those competitive seem to gravitate towards this frame. I've been trying to move to a more Win-Win frame, one that rests on interdependence. Your client poc in the story exemplifies that.
You totally nailed it Ajay! This is by far your best writing because I realize I have a need to see vulnerable side of people which I believe makes them more authentic. And having said that, I believe we stand against 2 opposite spectrums- you preferring an action oriented language and I- more feeling language. However, what we normalize becomes the norm, so I am happy to see that you are willing to pause and use language that seems “tentative”!
Such an interesting train of thought Ajay! I could relate to it - being on the other side :) It is so hard to be gentle and compassionate in a world that is designed to get the worst out of you. I was pondering over what my word for the year would be - I think I'll choose free.
I work in corporate and have a leadership role. I find that millennial women leaders, myself included aren't necessarily aiming for likability anymore. We're aiming for respect. There is a trade off here and that is the core of the issue. Women continue to be judged for being the fast talkers you've described, and the generational work in my view is to be the fast talker anyway. What men can do best to support this, is to give women the space to do that, instead of being surprised. I for one, don't think there is a clear 'Yin' style. Women and men both have masculine and feminine traits.
By the way, the fast talker in my mind was the male!
You are making me think Uthara, thank you. I will mull over what you have said. Thanks for reading & bringing in your voice.
As someone who has stayed away from corporate life because the masculine vocabulary you described fills me with revulsion and perhaps fear, I feel like I have gained so much insight into that which I had shut out in order to create myself.
"I realize I am judgmental about soft, caring, and emotional words. When people around me use such words, I seem to shrink inside." These two lines are a prism through which the world I had ignored so far now looks rich and expansive. Thankyou for sharing, Ajay.
Ajay, you outdid yourself, here! What a voice you have lend through these words
Thanks a lot!
As a woman, it's wonderful to see a man grow aware of the default male setting that's enabled in corporate life, and to consciously develop different ways of being and doing. Enjoyed reading this!
Love the reflections. I could see myself in some of the accounts you share. The language you mention, Ajay, suggests a Win-Lose frame of the world. Those competitive seem to gravitate towards this frame. I've been trying to move to a more Win-Win frame, one that rests on interdependence. Your client poc in the story exemplifies that.
You totally nailed it Ajay! This is by far your best writing because I realize I have a need to see vulnerable side of people which I believe makes them more authentic. And having said that, I believe we stand against 2 opposite spectrums- you preferring an action oriented language and I- more feeling language. However, what we normalize becomes the norm, so I am happy to see that you are willing to pause and use language that seems “tentative”!
Thanks Renu
Love these reflections, Ajay!
Candid and expansive, they open doors not only for you but all readers too
Thanks Natasha
Such an interesting train of thought Ajay! I could relate to it - being on the other side :) It is so hard to be gentle and compassionate in a world that is designed to get the worst out of you. I was pondering over what my word for the year would be - I think I'll choose free.